Saturday, January 30, 2010

through the mud on my eyes I can see my hope has come.

oh my, I'm home and it's right where I want to be. singing at the top of my lungs. cuddling with my little deer-like dog. sleeping in my soft bed. homemade cookies. an awesome brother. all the comforts of home. cable (hgtv & tlc). freezing temperatures! holy crow this house is so cold.

last night I got a ride home with my high school religion teacher. it was super nice of her to go out of her way a bit to pick me up and take me home on her way home from toronto. so greatly appreciated.

on thursday night I went to the residence formal with bhavani and some people from res (obv) and it was really fun. it was a small group of people, all dressed up, there to have a good time and the best part (from my perspective) is that they didn't offer free drinks so people weren't drunk past what they consumed BEFORE we left or expensively purchased at the club. made for a not-too-messy night and that was a relief - university parties are pretty disgusting most of the time. I've seen too many usually-covered body parts on the dancefloor at said events... all-in-all the snowball proved to be an enjoyable night.

in the morning I had my meeting with the man from urbanpromise. i walked down to the offices in the minus 17 weather - ugh wasn't it just last week we were in like canadian summer weather (4 degrees?!) - found the place alright. walked into the office and the man who had responded to my email was there, tim. we just sat down and chatted. he lived in barrie for about 10 years in the 80s so we knew some of the same people, places and just what a small world. he used to go to emmanuel and I always feel an ease when these kinds of discussions happen relating back to my home in barrie and at emmanuel. he needed a job done so we folded envelopes and letters and put them into other envelopes to be addressed and sent out later. I was there for an hour and a half and it all felt right. the services that urbanpromise provides sound incredible. I am so inspired by the fact that people are taking initiatives and trying to better the lives of people in their communities as opposed to always helping other people in "third world" countries. we need insane amounts of help right here in our backyards. basically what u.p. does is they go into the worst government-housing neighbourhoods, lead dinners for single mothers and create afterschool programs that help kids get their homework done, build relationships with the mentors, leaders and interns, be physically active, and learn about God. the point of the org is not to evangelize per se, they are more focused on being examples of God's constant love and building relationships with these children and single mothers to demonstrate the grace of God. but if they read to the kids or whatever it's from the Bible. I like this idea so much. of course it's awesome to lead people to God, tell others about God - in the Bible we have been called tons of times to do this - but I think almost as powerful as that is being a light for God and showing patience and compassion and being a good example. people will ask "where do you get the joy in your life?" they'll want to know how to be like that. enter conversation about God's saving grace and mercy.
although they don't really have a permanent or consistent job at u.p. for me, tim said he really wants to use me. he wants to show me the mothers dinner, he wants to take me to the after-school camps, he wants me to do some writing and some editing and he seemed very excited about me being there so I too am very excited. I give this over to God. I don't want to be disappointed or put down and the only way to ensure that is to give this situation (and everything) over the the Father.

speaking of father, I miss mine. and my momma. I can't wait to see them. I'm such a baby haha. second year of uni and I would still come home every weekend if I could. this week in some ways has been draining in regards to thinking about my dad. i watched those sad movies about dead parents, I had a very passionate conversation with some j-crew about having a family and how I hope and pray that I'll be able to start one sooner than later. it's not that I'm worried about the fact that I don't have a bf - no way - but I hope it's in my plan. I don't need a life partner now coz I ain't marrying him for a few years and I'm not going to date anyone I wouldn't potentially marry so I just hope in the next few years the Lord will bring someone exceptional into my life and then I won't be so consumed by the fear that I won't have little tattertots before my dad's age catches up to him.

on a lighter note, bethany dillion's new album "stop & listen" is awesome. there hasn't been a song yet that I haven't three starred which is great! def take a listen.

loveeeeeeeeee <3

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