Friday, June 11, 2010

to switch or not to switch, that is the question.

i had a very huge and life-changing idea yesterday.
what if i changed schools?

and moved back home?

i was imagining septemeber and going back to school and all i could see in my mind was me cowering in a corner, begging not to have to go back to utsc/scarborough. i thought, that's a pretty depressing image considering it's supposed to be 4 or 5 of the best years of my life and i'm supposed to be enjoying myself. why am i (well my parents) forking out thousands of dollars just so i can be miserable and terrified at the prospect of having to return to school?

don't get me wrong. i love school. now. and i love learning. but that's only when i'm in class. i don't love my school as in the institution. in fact i think it's extremely corrupt and completely greedy and selfish. they don't do anything special for their students, nothing that i see whatsoever.

it's like you pay a whole crapload of money just so after 5 years you can walk away with a piece of paper. i think i actually deserve to enjoy those 5 years.

the reason i dislike utsc so much is mostly because i haven't found a group. i'm lost. i'm used to being really involved in things and i have not yet found anything to join and be really passionate about. the only club that has ever tried to recruit me was the chinese management club - you can just imagine how that went down. i have no place. and because of this i have very few friends. and i'm used to know a lot of people. and truthfully, although i really do care about and enjoy the company of the friends of have made, i don't know if they are much more than school friends. will we have lifelong friendships? maybe, thanks to facebook. but the relationships i share with these people are nothing like the relationships i share with those from my church.

the biggest obstacle has been this whole church thing. the fact that i don't have one in scarborough. yes, i gave up pretty easily on finding one, but it's a bummer trying to find one. you would think you should be able to walk in anywhere and it should feel like home because it's a church and church people are supposed to be welcoming and friendly and inclusive but this is not always the case.

so here's my idea. and then a list of pros and cons.

obviously not the most ideal situation but i am considering moving home and taking university credits through the college - laurentian through georgian. laurentian is no university of toronto but nowadays isn't it the degree after the degree that matters more? it's not like i'm doing a fancy program at u of t anymore anyways, so what's my tie there? because it has a more prestigious name? yes, that's why i chose it in the first place, but is it really worth it? actually?

pros to switching schools:

- save a fortune (as my mom so eloquently stated, "your education will be dirt cheap!")*
- not have to transfer starbucks (even though i love my scarborough starbucks)*
- not have to live alone (seeing as i have no one to live with and communting... well let's say it would take the same amount of time to communte from barrie to scarbs as it would to drive from here to ottawa..)
- not having to sign year lease*
- more time with minnie
- home-cooked meals
- cuddle sessions with minnie all the time
- save money
- all the comforts of home
- my church! my church!
- save money..
- my "little" friends, aka the youth (i could be a more present youth leader)
- access to a vehicle
- not having to travel on bus/subway which is always excruciatingly long
- i would know people at georgian, would feel more comfortable, thus would meet more people
- did i mention, save money?*
- i expect to be significantly happier


cons to switching schools:

- my incredibly naggy mother
- starting all over (i don't always like change)
- i'm regressing... 2 years away from home and then coming back, might be weird
- my credits have to all transfer. i do not want to lose what i've already worked for
- chores
- laurentian degree vs. u of t degree
- i'm a city girl... stranded in a suburban world?
- if my degree says laurentian@georgian, that's a deal breaker
- media credits might mean nothing
- i don't want just an english degree - booooring.
- pooor internship options in barrie
- i'll miss my scarborough starbucks and tsn men
- barrie chaps sbux second-in-command....
- not getting to adventure toronto whenever i want (although mom says i can hop on the go anytime and hit up tdot)
- goodbye freedom..
- mother nagging me all day everyday
- not having my own place to decorate :(

* indicates that this also is of great benefit if i go on a two-month missions trip in the summer of 2011. i do not want to pay for or stay in an apartment in toronto throughout the summer, especially when i'm not there, and not having to sign a 1yr lease on an apartment would be a huge relief. not having to move around starbucks' would be another relief. if i was in scarborough and then wanted to work at the barrie starbucks for may and august, they would very surely not transfer me back, which would leave me to (1) pick up shifts randomly, which would be unreliable or (2), worst case scenario, i would be forced to quit because i wouldn't be able to fulfill the minimum required hours during the time i'm away. if i stayed in barrie, then i could hopefully take a 2 month leave for the time i'm travelling the world. and best of all reasons, i could save a ton of money. i already asked and my mom said that some of the money we would save from me not living in toronto could go towards my trip! just imagine how much i would save if i wasn't paying for my own: transportation, food, excessive shopping habits & access to shopping centres because of my freedom, etc! thousands of dollars probably! thousands!!


so making this list it's pretty obvious that my cons are just sort of lame peeves i have or something. i still gotta figure a lot of stuff out. any advice for meeee??

2 comments:

  1. Heyyy

    So I might be totally creepy for commenting on this, but I'm Chantelle Tinney (we went to highschool together), and I went to UTSC my first year. I felt the EXACT same way. I friggin hated every moment. I came home every single weekend and had anxiety attacks when I had to go back. All of my friends (all three that I made that year) feel the same way too. It's just a really weird school. I ended up transferring to McMaster and now live in Hamilton. All of my credits transferred no problem, and I actually kind of love it here.

    I do think it would be super weird to go from living on your own to moving back home, but it really is a very personal decision and you will lose many nights of sleep thinking about it. Well at least I did, haha. You can always transfer again if Laurentian/living at home doesn't work out for you. I transfered to Laurier before coming to Mac, and everything worked out fine, haha.

    In summation (haha), good luck with whatever you choose. I know EXACTLY what you are feeling like right now.

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  2. It sounds like you already made up your mind.

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